Moving on, I don't know if I have literally been eating my feelings. I certainly haven't been eating like someone who wants to lose 12lbs, I can tell you that much. I did realize today though, upon seeing a book cover, that the concept of eating ones feelings is a horrible paradox. Eating everything that I see while wondering if or when my phone is going to ring probably won't make my phone ring any faster. Similar to the age old adage "a watched pot never boils," a stuffed stomach has no relationship to which cellphone tower sends what signal if a signal has never been sent.
My next point, the weight gain associated with said eaten feelings probably won't be pretty. I'm not sure about you, but I know that I have the ability to eat a large amount of food in a short period of time. That being said, depending on the period of time in which my, or your, phone has not rang, a significant amount of actual gain in poundage can occur. As if we didn't have enough insecurities prior to whatever has caused this porkalicious behavior.
Bringing this train to it's final stop, if the phone doesn't ring for, let's say, a month and you, or me, think about it everyday you could gain like...FIVE POUNDS. And if it's the holiday season, I think statistically speaking that number doubles. I wasn't a math major, so I am not sure how accurate that really is but that isn't the point. Now that we have gained all that weight, I bet whoever wasn't calling us before is going to be thrilled that we can't fit into our pants anymore. I'm just saying.
Ok, maybe that was a little extreme. I am simply suggesting that the literal eaten feeling really isn't going to help anyone except your butcher...and possibly Weight Watchers.
The good news for you is, caffeine is an appetite suppressant. And there is a Starbucks around the corner. Also, remember while your phone isn't ring, dinging or chiming that he isn't worth 5lbs -- that's 10lbs November through December.
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